Sep 1, 2008

the grand old dame

my grandma-in-law was truly amazing. a middle school drop-out (not out of choice, but by marriage), she quit school but not learning. a regular reader of the daily paper and books, this wise lady was in charge of my marital family... she made the decisions on what is to be cooked, when some visits are to be made, what gifts are to be given on occasions in and outside the family...
in fact, when B decided on me, it was this lady who vetted his choice... met me at their place, caressed me and said, "my grandson loves you... so we all do."
it was she my parents met before the wedding... and came away thoroughly impressed...
the best gift i received from her was a poem she wrote and sent on the morning of the wedding, welcoming me into her family...
we have shared a lot of time together, cut jokes at each other and other members of the family... her stories of her day and time enchanted me... the imprint of her being i still see in B since it was she who looked after him in his childhood...
when my Dad passed away, she was so stumped that she could not come to meet us... only when we, my Mom, bro and i were a little settled, did she come and said, just these, "it was a battle between D (death) and D (doctor) and the latter was defeated."
she herself passed away in 2001... going back to the family has changed forever, since there is none who has such unbound affection for me... the only time she was visibly upset with me is when i enrolled R into a play school when she was just two... she had commented, "her mother wants a Nobel laureate out of her, thus the hurry to make the little child grow up."
i did not change my decision and R continued to go to school, but i remember her words whenever i try to hurry R into a grown up mode...

1 comment:

deep said...

a lot of it i find common with my grandma who similarly welcomed A into the family with a poem. She too is a middle school dropout, has given her all to make ends meet at a time when the family wasnt well off, has petted my ma who lost her's bfore her 1st b'day & continues to inspire R. She's still around & it is her ailments that disturb me the most.